I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
Fuck. sleeping in my sisters room again I heard zombie noises outside my window
I was curling my hair today and I looked at my curling iron and thought...
You at least unplugged it right?
Apparently telling a group of crying girls that it looks like they need a visit from Dr. Phil isn't the best pickup line.
I was in the shower, he came in, had me give him a blow job, and left. I'm pretty sure I was just booty called. While taking a shower.
It was like getting head from an anaconda
RIGHT?!?! I'M ACTUALLY UPSET I DON'T GET TO MAKE THE 2.3 MILE TREK TO SUCK HIS COCK, yes I google earthed it.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
I think we can all agree that the size of her boobs, combined with beer, is destroying my ability to judge looks.
He keeps telling me he's gonna get me dope for my birthday. 1. HELP ME. 2. HOW IS THAT AN ACCEPTABLE BIRTHDAY PRESENT. Also, please HELP ME.
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
Lol I wish they went straight to your cock then shot out into my mouth like a cock nacho dispenser
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
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