So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
Just ran into that chick u called from my phone and left her a MSG bout how she has aids
Ahaha, good shit
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Why is Kyle using one of my nieces as a blunt object to provoke and attack my other niece?
So we have also come to the conclusion that slam piece Saturday's are the appropriate follow ups to find a husband Fridays
Hey remember that spam cooked in dr pepper we made? 10x better when the dr pepper is rum
Was so drunk I had to masturbate face up cuz I thought I was gonna be suffocated by the pillows.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
So he cheated on his gf again. For the third time. Second time with me. HE CRIED WHILE DRIVING ME HOME BECAUSE HE CHEATED ON HER. And I laughed the entire way. Good god I'm an asshole.
Randomize
