Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
we were frolicking through a fountain of pizza rolls. it was like the best dream i ever had
Taking jello shots out of a big bowl from a measuring spoon. holla atcha boy.
They let me close the tennis center alone. It's a 6-minute drive from 2 of my booty calls. Scratch tennis court bj off the bucket list.
Apparently love is stronger than SoCo
You told me I couldn't make out with you until I added you on LinkedIn
He was an asshole the entire night and then tried to touch my dick in a Michaels craft store.
Sooooo, no second date?
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
he brought with him gifts of cookie dough and penis. upgrading our relationship from fwb's to bf/gf was an incredibly smart merger.
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
You don't come back from leaving a bag of shit on someone's counter Jill
I absolutely love waking up to see my phone search history is "xj" "qj" "cj" "uj" and "kj"
They are in the bedroom next door. We might have a threesome idk. Jesus take the wheel.
GO. DO.
I am Jesus and I am taking the wheel.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Randomize
