you know what i hate about salt? you can't see it.
Yeah, we realized keeping you in a cage wasn't beneficial to us
shes got a really nice body. but her face is eh.
you dont need a face to have sex
Smoked a bowl on a rollercoaster. Literally ON. Beat that.
Well, at least he doesn't refer to you as his associate. his mattress associate
I feel like everytime I call him he's either fucking or getting into trouble. It's really disturbing that he presses the answer button and then proceeds to fuck her harder.
There is a pile of hair outside the apartment next door. At least now I know what all that shouting was about last night.
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Yeah but you let me touch your butt. You're clearly the winner.
You licked my eyeball, you are officially cut off. If you just missed you can have a second chance on Friday.
dude it's 9am and i'm still drunk it's too early for sexting
You're not who I thought you were. You've changed.
Too much dab too little lung dying šµšµšµ
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
I think my liver just tried to kill me, we need to slow down
Randomize
