he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
It was the most graceful puke ever. I just thought she dropped something underneath the bar until she told me what happened.
Threesome in a minivan. New low
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
They get 5 minutes to wear their speedos at the wedding
Oh my god I'll have to be really drunk for that
I still smell like men's body wash from that drunken shower I took at that stranger's home last night.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
I promised him we could have sex if he would let me take him to the hospital to get stitches.
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
This town is a penis wasteland. I haven't seen a suitable penis in months. This is becoming an emergency situation. I need penis in my life
I think I fucked the doubts about us out of him
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
I need advice on ways to politely say “fuck you on your way to hell”.
Randomize