I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
I forgot it was 4/20. that COMPLETELY explains the 7/11. i was like "that's a lot of white dudes... and they're really into snacking."
Any questions about why there was a scuba tank chilling in the hot tub this morning?
In a min. With a stripper at the hospital. Business. Not pleasure.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
She was drunk and naked on our couch, sweating and masterbating to SNL. We made eye contact and she didn't even stop. It's new-roommate-o-clock
Yeah man it sucked balls. People on the bus probably thought I was fucking crazy. I was fetal position, taking up two seats with no shame whilst simultaneously panting.
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Sometimes i think i need to stop drinking because i can't afford losing so many panties anymore
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
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