you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
so i just calculated it and i would need to score 150% on this final to pass
He blow dried my hair while I sucked his dick. Now THAT'S fucking teamwork.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
Martha Stewart has had a one night stand and is unsure if she's had a threesome. I no longer feel slutty.
Saw a girl on a walk of shame bend down and look in a pizza box by a trash can to see if there was still a slice left. That's when you know
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
There's some random guy here dryhumping my kitchen door. If he is a friend of yours, please come and retrieve him.
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
He's going to be in the air guitar championships in june. Need I say more.
Randomize
