yeah he didnt know till after their one year. You have no idea how bad i wanna say "dude i sucked on those boobs before you"
he was actually really polite. he asked before he came on my chest because he "wasn't sure my stance on it".
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
btw when he was trying to sleep i was apparently poking him in the face w my 'flipper' slurring random manatee facts
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
Currently microwaving whipped cream to make white Russians and hotboxing the kitchen while this random kid is dancing in the corner.
Just to prove a point, she called and ordered a pizza 10 min before she ordered the blow and it still got here first. I may never leave LA.
I told you!!! And that is why he's the drug dealer to the stars.
He actually offered up a silent prayer thanking God for my "tremendous ass." You tell me how my night is going.
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
We got to the second bar and all he kept saying was "I'm on an alcohol safari!" Best 21st birthday ever.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
Ate 3 ghost peppers and chased them with Everclear last night. Currently on the toilet cursing the universe and everyone in it.
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
Randomize
