suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
there are way too many $1s in my wallet for last night to have been 'tame'
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
I guess I was trying to make a cheese sandwich, I had to change my sheets cuz I slept on it and the cheese melted all over me, Dave, and my bed
Made up a full house drinking game
On my way.
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
Me too, I feel like I pinched your nipples excessively. At the time it seemed like a good idea, but in retrospect I'm not so sure.
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
I just moonwalked my socks off. THAT LAZY. THAT HIGH.
These tits shall not be calmed
So I've already made 5 bad decisions today, wyd?
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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