The worlds most fuckable chipmunk
Sex has been so nonexistent lately that when I was masturbating the other day, I actually paused to yawn.
How come it tastes like onions whenever I go down on her?
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
i know this sounds kinda weird but his cock smelled like fabric softener. it was so refreshing.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
He texted his hospitalized grandma while inside me, so really a perfect gentleman.
How do u even exfoliate your vagina
Got my client divorced finally. He was even awarded the cat ashes. Yep I went to law school for this.
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