I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
I woke up wearing nothing but 7 partially eaten candy necklaces. Only one was around my neck. Don't even try to tell me I don't need plan B.
woke up with the bag of wine duct taped to my shoulder.
I heard him say "bet you won't", look over 10 seconds later and she's blowing him.....looked eloquent under the glow of a camp fire.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
I'm sorry but if you can talk well enough to critique his oral game, he clearly needs the pointers.
What part of I just want to watch porn, eat Taco Bell, and masturbate did you not understand?
I don't see why I have to pay for it.
your head went through the window, you're pretty much obligated to pay for it.
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
Randomize
