Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
this kid at 40 friday greeted another kid by saying "heeey farmville neighbor"
dude.
yep. needless to say i didn't meet anyone and spent yet another friday night masturbating.
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
we went to get a refill in his room and ended up having sex and passing out. then he woke me up with sex and gave me a beer for breakfast. i never want this to end
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
I got carried out by security last night. AND the taxi had to drive up onto the sidewalk to get me i was that drunk.
I just almost caught my floor on fire, then decided I could put it out with my knuckles! So I'm doing good!
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
I came twice and when I was done I petted his head and said "you did good kid you did good" and just laid back smiling. Tell me I'm not awesome.
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