I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
My mom just set up beer pong in the dining room for family game night. and you ask why I'm still living at home.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Eating a muffin with a knife and fork. Hangovers have hit a new low.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
We waved. But it was a "let's hook up" wave.
You okay?
I walked into work with a banana and a loaf of bread
trying to figure out what happened last night by looking around the apartment.
naked man under the piano. THE PLOT THICKENS.
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
i saw way too much penis for that to have been a funeral
the hole that the tears left- fill it with pizza
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
Randomize
