I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
I'm this close to masturbating to his profile pics from 2006
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
Hindsight: Dressing up in nothing but a bra, booty shorts, and police tape made for the most awkward walk of shame of my life.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Yes sir I did. I'll be there with a guest. And no, my date won't be an escort.
Well if that changes tell the escort to bring cocaine.
Idk man, we spent like 20 mins arguing about the moral ambiguity of fucking in someone else's car
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
Is this like a preordered booty call?
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
I really need to curb my attractions to blondes with tattoo sleeves, firearms and alcoholism
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
Randomize
