For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
Pizza and koolaid didn't even make me feel better. This hangover means business
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
He will forever be known as the toe sucker who may or may not have been a father
just realized I'll be in a check out line with just Hershey syrup and condoms. I don't know if I am setting a good image for our generation
I'm either hallucinating or there is a dying cat outside my apartment....
Fuck your fuckin pumpkin spice. You and your subtle differences frighten and disgust me.
My manager is trying to help me find a good career path, and I'm trying to find a professional way to tell him I just wanna smoke and fuck.
Randomize