She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
That's the first time you've ever said the L word without referring to drinking or partying.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I was scared that I should know him but I was too busy blacking out to remember
I'm on acid right now in three feet of snow. I NEEEED YOOOOUUUU
I'm sure I'll run in to him again, there's only so many VA detoxes.
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
How did you end up breaking into that laundromat at 3am? I saw the snapchat but like..... How?
All my friends are getting into relationships and going through breakups and I'm having Plan Bs and crunch wraps for dinner.
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Everything is fine, it's not hung over in here at all\n\n*Narrator* *but in fact everything was not fine*
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize