he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
fell asleep with the bong in the pool, weirdest tan line ever
Nothing says I have a hang over like telling your boss to "eat your shit"
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
You know how hard it is to drive a dirtbike down a road with 2 plants of weed on your lap. Fucking hard
You need to let me be on top sometimes. I gotta get rid of these love handles
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
I decided it might be a good time to stop when he requested I "bring that pussy over here"
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
She was wearing American flag underwear. How could I NOT fuck her?
You're a true patriot.
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