You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
all i know is that they all tuched my pee cup last night.
I don't care where my tongue is but i t's going to be in all the pictures.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
:(. i have vodka in a fire extinguisher. that solves all problems. except fires. it would actually make that worse.
The best part about theater chicks is nothing is too cliche or out of line. I just fucked her Braveheart style in my entry way while saying goodbye.
EVEN AFTER ALL THAT COMPLAINING... STILL NO PENIS
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
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