Just woke up naked in my storage cubby and some one rearragned my whole room?
no jk, not my room
I can't get out of the parking garage so now I'm staying downtown....Typical
This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
he fucked me so hard i could feel my pelvis shifting. like i legit feel more prepared for childirth now
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
when a dude sends me an unwanted dick pic I just send him a picture of a nicer one. A more photogenic one. A dick with a future.
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
Are you really trying to argue your case that you seduced my cat?
I forgot that I'm high because of how high I am.
Your vagina must be outstanding or have a secret entrance to Narnia if someone is will to fly from Texas for one night of it.
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