The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
Don't judge me. Haven't eaten all day so I'm in my room sticking my finger in peanut butter, then jam, then my mouth.
it's a girl!!
That's great, I look forward to meeting her in 18 years
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
I remember seeing LSAT prep books and thinking "Whose room is this? I should be hooking up with them instead."
You tried to tell her that the salad was an afrodisiac then proceeded to stroke yourself with the feather duster
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Also... I'm unsure what to do with my face while someone is choking me during sex. Like I feel like its hard to look flattering.
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
Had sex on the beach last night with a drug dealer. win-win-win situation
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
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