Remind me to tell you the Scottish bar story tomorrow
Remind me to tell you it was a shitty story when you're done telling it tomorrow
i need a lesbian romance or unplanned pregnancy for some spicein my life.
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
does it still count as break up sex if it's 4 months later? sorry i'm just looking for an excuse to fuck him.
Thanks for coming to the hospital with me, In return, I will buy you ecstasy.
Currently shopping online for cardboard cutouts of various horror characters. That should teach me roommates to stop taking acid on Tuesdays.
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
I just want to have beer shits in my own bathroom. Is that too much to ask for?
Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
You're either getting fucked or a coupon to Friendly's. I haven't decided yet.
My mom always wanted to raise a classy lady, it just turned out to not be her daughter.
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
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