i'm at sigma nu and gary is here. what do it do?
Stay away from his face.
so i go for his dick?
Dude. I tried to convince her to eat poprocks and give me a blowjob. It did not work out well.
I just puked in my fish tank. Helloooooo summer.
he saw my boobs and came all over himself... there goes my whole night.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
stopped you just in time from sledding down the roof.
Just bought all my wine for the weekend with a check at 11am. I'm almost judging myself.
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
I threw up sweet potatoes. Worst thing to throw up ever. They came back mashed.
do you think our homemade porn will pass for my cinematography final?
You had me on my knees catching cheese balls in my mouth and moaning. In front of all your friends.
I am seriously only coming over if there are McNuggets. I want 10 bitch. Honey mustard.
The moment you tore my shirt off I knew I wanted to spend the rest of my life with you
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Randomize
