From behind she looks like Richard Simmons
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
i always knew that i'd have sex in your room, i just assumed it would be with you
Some mysterious chinese delivery man dropped off 2 free egg rolls. Clutch
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
nothing says 4th of july like teaching grandma how to work a keg
You force fed me chocolate chips and avocados for 3 hours and kept asking me about my trip to sweden when I was 4.
Btw...I puked in my hand last night and threw it on the floor. Don't let me do tequila ever again.
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
I woke up in the middle of the night on all fours turning circles in my bed! No more patron for me!
I cant wait to tell our kids we met because you subscribed to my onlyfans.
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