I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I feel like this whole "telling that guy i have a kid to avoid him" thing is getting out of hand..
How so?
Probably at the point when i told him i was "Too drunk to drive" and "had to pick up my kid" all in a span of like 2 hours.
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
she was literally 3 feet away from the garbage can, said she couldn't make it, and then proceeded to vomit on the floor in front of everyone in the restaurant
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
Nahh no judgin. Compliments to the balls are always heartfelt
Dude, you got arrested and then texted 911 to tell them you'd been kidnapped with a screenshot of your current location.
You ruined the universe
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
Either my boss has an enormous dick or he’s hiding a can of tennis balls in his bike shorts
Maybe I will go to the company picnic
It’s Sunday Funday! Stop watching football and bring your penis over here. There will be plenty of scoring!
Randomize
