Spring semester is just not the same w/o you
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
I got it! After our exam we take shots for every question we skipped!!!
I don't wanna die...
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I am a murderer. I ran over so many baby frogs. I wanted to stop and pick some up to take home, but all I have is a wine bottle. I'd hate to explain that to a cop.
I found you walking along the street hammered. You walked up said hi and handed me a beer.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
As I was about to fuck him, he requested a moment of silence for Leonard Nimoy.
It's 1am and I'm on LSD and I have diarrhea in a Dunkin Donuts. Help me
Maybe I'm not hungover. Maybe I'm actually dying.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
he said he couldn't believe he just lost his virginity and passed out. what have i done
I’ll call you in a minute. Trying to book an AirBnB so I can finally bang the yummy guy from yoga
Your downward dog is going to rock his cock. I’m jealous
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