I am puke
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
Just seeing my phone say "picture message from: Senor Floppy Cock", i knew it was going to make me smile.
woke up to the trail of sugar cubes leading to my bed........was i that uncooperative last night
West Wing DVD drinking game: drink whenever they waqlk around a lot. I LOVE POLITICS SO MUCH
found her sleeping in the closet. woke her up and she said she was camping.
Well I squeegeed the puke off your arm at the gas station
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I believe you called it tequila and nipples. The proceeded to strike a pose.
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
The fact I have to evaluate my choice between tequila and fruity pebbles is a clear image of my life right now
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
I think pants incapable of making pants work
I was drunk, but not drunk enough to forget I had some dude on his knees begging for forgiveness.
Randomize
