I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
things it involved: vodka, boy parts, possible photos of me on a cell phone. things it did NOT involve last night: my bra, his pants, and sobriety.
ice luge is my downfall...
...u mean upfall.
i know they say sex burns calories but i think i actually gained weight from just lying there for the whole 2 minutes
By getting ready I mean putting baby powder in my hair and possibly changing my pajamas to another pair of pajamas
She was crying and singing Taylor Swift on repeat. I'm never drinking with her again.
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
It's totally ok to sleep with him. The only place I have feelings for him is in my vagina.
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
She flashed them and they let her pay with Monopoly money. I'm married, so it is your obligation as my best man to repeatedly fuck her for me
I thanked him for the booty call offer but told him I'd rather just do it myself
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I got up and left his place at 3am because I remembered I had a burrito in my car.
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