My therapist said that she thinks i may have a sex addiction. I think she may be a terrible therapist.
Want me to drive you to Dr. Drew's sex rehab?
Nah, cause then i cant masturbate to that show anymore.
You seemed more interested in the queso dip than you were in the hand job
Any night you end up on the couch next to the trash can with a bag of white wine on your head is a rough night.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
wine lets you be on time to class apparently
This is a dangerous realization
THIS ISN'T WORKING THIS IS THE DRUNK LEADING THE DRUNK
He's a huge toolbag douche loser with a below average dick who doesn't know how to treat a girlfriend. He was my rebound after Brady. It was a pitiful 1 month rebound "extravaganza"
The $10 cab ride turned into a $60 cab ride when you puked down the back of his seat trying to whisper in his ear. He was a trooper though, he came into to wash off in the sink and still tried to get your number.
50% drunk capacity currently
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
Waking up with cheese all over my clothes and my vibrator in my pants is a sign we drank way too much tequila last night
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
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