Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
i just saw someone crawling up the stairs to the dorm while screaming "i have the best vagina!"
So he just rolled over in his sleep and said "that's a punctuation mark..."
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
Because ur a stupid bitch
Actually, I'm graduating from college on Saturday so that makes me a well educated bitch.
she won't take no for an answer... no matter what language i said it in
after eating me out, he asked for something to drink. i gave him a glass of water and he said he needed something stronger.
she wanted to watch hairspray while we fucked. she's obviously your kinda girl, dude.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
How soon is too soon to enter the slutty phase of this breakup?
Only you could make a reflective vest look even remotely sexy
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
I'm going to have to go for it. It's like Mt. Everest. It's large and unpredictable but I live for adventure and it's worth never coming back from. Mt. BigDick.
From now on he's gonna have to shave first. It feels like I got eaten out by a chainsaw!
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
