so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
last night he was wasted watching Entourage and changed everyone in his phone book to LLOYD!!!!
Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
Just opened a bottle with my rape whistle. At least it's finally getting used for something.
I'm going to make him fall in love with me one blow job at a time.
Tell me you remember me getting a tampon from the girl throwing up in the next stall
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
In preparation of Wine in the Woods next weekend, today we're hosting Straight Vodka in the Bathtub
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
When a best friend shows up on a tricycle with a case a beer and goes "get on loser" you get on, because there is a magical adventure afoot
I left her alone for a few minutes and she's already using a guy on his hands and knees as a chair while another guy is serving her margaritas.
I put a bagel at the end of my bed so every time I want a bite I have to do a sit up
dave might be using McDoubles to pay for dances
he has gotten at least 7 lap dances out back
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