you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
Deadliest Catch is NOT foreplay
He asked for his proof of insurance and he pulled out a Magnum by mistake. All of the sudden gignger was looking real good to me.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
I can now tell my grandchildren Central Park has really great spots for quickies...
High Amy loves you. Sober Amy is unsure, but she's not here so fuck that bitch.
Hey he's not bad, although he did have a glass eye
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Trying to decide who to DD on the fourth and I came up with a Who's who of guys I've hooked up with in the last month. Not an ideal situation, but I have a feeling it's gonna happen anyway.
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
They got mad when I cut the pizza with an x-acto knife. Oh well, more for me then.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
I expected better sex from someone with the word CHAOS tattooed above his dick. But on the bright side, he was down to watch a documentary on Honey Badgers afterwards so I guess I'll keep him around.
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
