so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
you were sitting on the floor cleaning up your own puke and telling my mom she should hire you as a maid.
the only human I can compare her to is rosie o'donnell.
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I threw up in the shower, slipped, and fell in it. Should I try and continue my day or just get back in bed?
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
You tried to bite my nipple like 3 times
NAh son
Just general bites
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
the man at taco bell in the drive thru window tried to sell me his mix tape
his single is called “stick some holes in it”
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