who cares. he's ugly and has a dick this big -->
she came to the game with a camelback filled with booze. except it was only the bag part so she duct taped to her back
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
Not drinking has really freed up a lot of my time. I made a bracelet yesterday. I miss bars.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Just gave my thesis presentation, pretty sure I made out with the admissions woman last night.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
He sent me a dick pic. I am fighting the urge to send him a "sorry for your loss" card.
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
But at least i made friends with the nice lesbian cop. She knew i was her kind when she had to confiscate my rainbow/pride rolling papers.
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
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