I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
will power is for people who don't want to get laid
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
He threw up. He never throws up. It was like finding out superman cant fly anymore. I was so sad for him.
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
Wow. A quad shot of peppermint schnapps. I feel like I just deep throated a candy cane. Best 21st ever.
Like really my mothers day gift is a pic of his dick
I'm gonna eat you out with that hat on so it looks like beaker's doing it. And I'm gonna go "memememememe"
I run into you far too many times while completely stoned and/or drunk for this not to be fate. It's like god is telling you to fuck me.
It has been happening a lot lately.
Yuck. My throat feels like someone chucked a couple of Maltov cocktails down it and finished it off with a super soaker filled with Jameson.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
Saw two pregnant women at court today and I SWEAR one of them said "we had a threesome with this random guy and he got both of us pregnant."
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
I think this is the first time I heard a lesbian version of baby it's cold outside.
Randomize
