you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
How am I a tease?
Dude you flashed me ur vagina and walked away.
ONLY PART OF IT.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
we did it on the golf course and he threw the condom in the pond. some poor fish is gonna choke on it
We should reintroduce naked Mondays
He was going down on me as I discovered a spaghetti-O on my boob. Its been a while since I faked it.
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
Should probably stop going into the gas station to look for the most normal person to hitch a ride with to drive me to a party
thanks for supporting my whoreish tendencies
You threw him in the dryer?
He went in of his own accord. Mumbled something about experiencing the blossoming of popcorn.
Randomize