I hope you get the herp and dife. The emd.
i dont know you, but i just did a line with your business card.
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
I thought she was being abused so tried to go in at the sympathy angle, but the bruises were from pole dancing. I went in at all angles.
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
THERE IS A VIDEO OF DMX SINGING RUDOLPH THE RED NOSE REINDEER
I'm officially in the Christmas spirit
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
Just saw the cop you hooked up with over break. He’s def hotter in uniform.
Tell him to stop shaving his pubes. #Notmyjam
poll: am I friendzoned if he just called me brochacha? on one hand, he called me bro, but on the other, he used the a to make it feminine.
im having flashbacks to my time in a waffle cult composed of 9 to 14 year olds
Randomize
