we fucked while standing on a ladder. challenging, but worth it.
Article 1, law 1, section 1 of the apartment 25 party handbook: tarp will be purchased prior to any and all future parties. Aforementioned tarp will be placed on floor. Any and all sick patrons must relocate to tarp preceding the event of expulsion of bodily fluids. Failure to do so will result in ejection of guilty patron and banishment of the accused from succeeding party. All patrons must read and sign a copy before entry is granted.
I am listening to lecture and I can hear us in the background talking about anal beads.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
were you high?
When?
Actually just blanket yes to that question
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Oh, did your mom say anything else about my butt?
I keep worrying she's gonna have a repeat of the time the ceiling fan was talking in Chinese
Randomize
