Aj just asked if we were going to the bulldog tonight..i told her no because of the expense and tests coming up..but mostly because i don't want herpes
you proceeded to suck on ur pinkie saying it reminded you of chris and you wanted him badly
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
He insists on falling asleep with his penis between my buttcheeks. He says its his "home".
The bride and groom wore the Batman masks I brought. Best wedding ever.
Im drinking ciroc out of an ice cream cone... my night is going fantastic
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
I let him stay at my place since i had to work early and when i got home there was a fruit snack wrapper in my bed. I dont have any fruit snacks. Which means he brought his own fruit snacks to the fuck session.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
I feel like I purchased a one way ticket to hell last night and its non refundable.
You’re not his type
I’ve got blonde hair and great tits. I’m every man’s type
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