I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
only if we run a train.
done.
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
and then when she swallowed her birth control with a shot of vodka and looked in my direction, i knew it was time to go.
i came home at 4 a.m. and made a dozen eggs and three lbs. of bacon. my mom woke up and the only thing she was pissed about was that i used the whole carton of eggs, but then she sat down and ate with me
At the bar. Madeline and I totally brought our own pitcher from home because they always run out. Hello alcoholism.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Nothing is better than seeing someone you fucked go to the Olympics. I feel so American.
National champion athletes like gay butt sex, too. I'm just here to help them out.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
I usually do that but weve been going unprotected with tribal fertility symbols painted above my door
Why are you hurting?
Tried to drink all the beer in Nashville last night....failed.
Randomize
