haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
Answer the phone when I call you in a second. Just got pulled over for getting road head, going to secretly put you on speaker phone, this should be good
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
She fell asleep on the sidewalk and people starting using her as a hurdle
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
I'm seriously considering refraining from drinking on school nights.
I like how you say that with 4 school days left of the school year..
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
I know this is super early in advance but can I borrow your horse mask on 4/20
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
He kept saying "i'm lost" while he was sitting on his couch...
Never go to your parents' super bowl party. I learned, in great detail, "Why Aunt Trisha is a hoe" Not enough beer on the eastern seaboard.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
