Shame should no longer be a word in your vocabulary.
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
im breathing rainbows and everyone is talking in bubbles whatever you gave me give me more
he spent an hour trying to convince us that Ted Nugent is Kid Rock from the future. by the end of it i was very close to believing him.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
you told the taxi driver your yeast infection was so bad you wanted to F a popsicle
Two grav bong hits and a shower later and I'm ready for company
It's like you say things that speak to my soul on a deep personal level
FYI telling a guy that you're glad his dick isn't big after giving him a bj, is NOT a compliment.
i asked your drunk ass where the fuck you were going and you screamed “WENDY’S BITCH”.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
You went on the date? His pickup line was I swear I'm not a serial killer and you went on the date???
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