you know you were way too high when you wake up next to a handwritten list of all the things you'd do for a Klondike bar
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
For those pictures, I will suffer this headache.
my mom just informed me that im way nicer when im high and offered to supply my weed until our house guests leave.
does that include her cleaning your bowl?
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Coming out of the blackout mid beej was nice. Seeing her face was not.
It's what America was founded on: former hookups referring you for a job four years later.
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
The only responsible thing ive done in vegas is shower and that was onky to clean vomit off me
I'm getting better, this year I only showed up drunk to 1 final.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
So, if you were also having sex around 11pm, then we were legitimately being penetrated at the exact same time. That is amazing. We are soul sisters.
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
So! As of five minutes ago I've officially masturbated in every room in my apartment
Dude, I helped you move in yesterday...
If you have been drunk at one point during the day and are going to bed sober that same day, something is very wrong.
Randomize
