awww and there was just a proposal on stage with the pussycat dolls !!!!!
Did someone propose they get off the stage?
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
She said she never had to courage to go fully shaved. Since when did shaving your snatch become courageous?
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
apparently the bartender would rather give me free shots than tell me that my whole nipple piercing was hanging out
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
My teacher just let our class out 30 minutes early, its a 50 minute class. He said the only thing we had to do was get fucked up tonight and have stories about it on Monday.
LET US USE OUR GENITALS TO CELEBRATE THIS VICTORY
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I told my therapist about the other night and he actually whistled and said "wow that is not good."
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
It's like sleep walking but with blowjobs
I'm only texting you this bc god forbid circumstances change when you wake up but currently santa is asleep on top of the washer and dryer.
Randomize
