I glued a penny on the door Tricia believes its Patrick Swayze haunting our apartment. Fuckin potheads.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
i dont understand why you dont get why i love him. i opened the bathroom door and he had his penis in his right hand and a mcdouble in his left.
there is no 'pace myself' on the blackout express
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
Do you want the fat one with an ok face or the skinny ugly one?
It doesn't matter as long as our shame is in tandem.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
Great litmus test for what a useless adult you are: amount of shame you feel while eating a coffee cup of Fruity Pebbles
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
You were laying on the floor coloring a "get well soon' card for your liver...
I would climb him like a jungle gym. Enthusiastically and creatively.
It was like Lady and the Tramp, but just tramp and the tramp. And instead of spaghetti and meatballs, we had whiskey and cups
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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