I walked up to her and said hello and wanted to ask her if she had fun last night... she asked me if we had met before.
forecast for tonight is alcohol, low standards and poor decisions.
Even DaVinci knew it was gay to draw the penis big. Thanks art history
Just so you know, coffee creamer+water does not = milk.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
I have a challenge for you: find out where you are. you will receive Taco Bell if you succeed
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Woke up on the stairs at my parents house. Good start to vacation.
You don't have anything to lose--we've established that he's not going to murder you and he smells good.
Roommate just came in drunk and tweaked out because my tv has a DVD player built in. Waaaaaayyyy too sober for that conversation.
I'm ashamed and embarrassed. Unless we get drunk and have random sex with people we will never see again we might lose ourselves.
She found my old SD card with stuff I "didn't keep" or "didn't record us doing".... She's pissed but really horny. Did I just win at sex?
Give me an out of order sign and caution tape and we can have sex practically anywhere.
I might as well just sew it shut at this point.
We were making out on the floor and his 13 year old beagle crawled in between us & just sat there...I got cockblocked by an ancient beagle named Bubba
Randomize
