That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
would it be rude to tell a homeless man that he should sell the lebron jersey and brand new nikes he's wearing if he's really that hungry
I have located the smell of the stripper and narrowed it down to 3 girls in class
I was so proud to be driving sober that I wanted to get pulled over so I could tell the officer I hadn't been drinking.
there are teeth marks in the soap. why are there teeth marks in the soap.
I just realized how early it is, you're taking this booty call thing to a whole other level. also, there are altoids all over my room, that was weird
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
You know it's nice having a girlfriend who will lotion your balls for you
In other news: I massively over-caffeinated this morning. Everything is vibrating and I can SEE THROUGH TIME
Oh my god I need an adult
Wait shit I am an adult
they were drunk. and loud. and now they're drunk and quiet. or dead, you never know.
Stacy was in the bathroom puking, so he peed out the window. We were eight stories up.
Randomize
