Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
i guess it wasn't a booty call since he got home from the club at 6:00 am... he told me to consider it morning sex
The extent of my physical activity is running from the cops.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
Oh you know..Chillin with your dad.
With a fannypack full of drugs.
I threw up in my closet when I was hammered last night. Like a fucking toddler. I can't play with the grow ups.
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
What a better way to celebrate that I'm single by becoming a stripper and making $1000 in one night
Jealous. I want an iud. Maybe there's a late night bodega that'll insert one for me
Funny story... I got into my car and my porn started playing over my Bluetooth.
You can’t judge a dick by its balls.
It was funny for a while but 3 days later I still can't walk and I've constructed a diaper-like contraption to hold the ice pack on my vagina.
Randomize
