Ambien. No doubt about it.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Chipotle...archenemy of the gay man. Cockblocking me since 1997
I hope this adventure ends at a hospital
Definitely want to eloquently cunt punt those bitches thru the field goals of life.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Duuuude someone spilled hot sauce all over the floor and trailing outside wtf
OH GOD IT'S BLOOD. THIS IS ALOT OF BLOOD.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
I may have passed out and puked all over the host's favorite couch, but three hours and a rip later, I was eating tiramisu in the bathtub with the birthday boy and a hot Italian.
Randomize
