Why don't I have your new number? And who have I been texting?
No, I'm talking to this Chinese girl. Can't understand a word she's saying, but i think i caught the word vagina a few times.
Can't remember why I called but it definitely had something to do with Lou Bega
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
I wish i could call my weed and hear it ring. That's how i found my phone.
Brutal- a couple weeks back I had a 28 hr blackout and four day hangover. S'why I decided to haul it in
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
He's coming over for beer and a movie, but I just don't know if he's interested.
Pathetic and sad. I should come over there and fuck both of you just to get the ball rolling.
Just let me take your liver out and beat it with a meat tenderizer for you..
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
Who loses their virginity to fucking Flo Rida
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Just saw a girl I banged wearing a pro life shirt downtown. Not sure where to start with that.
Come on in and take your pants off
You turned down sex for fried cheese??
My penis and doctor won't be happy with me, but come on. Fried cheese!
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