Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
aw he's cute...not in a i wanna rip his clothes off way more of a put him in my pocket and keep him as a pet
And occasionally lick whipped cream off them abs
Exactly.
they arrested me when i was peaking, i'm pretty sure they were specifically looking for me but i was too busy rolling around, loving the grass to notice the police car..
I think whatever his name is just puked on the stairs. Just an fyi for the morning. Love you.
So, do you ever feel like EVERY SINGLE ONE OF YOUR FRIENDS IS INVOLVED IN A MASSIVE AND INTRICATE CONSPIRACY TO COCKBLOCK YOU AT ALL COSTS?
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
he was once again the drunkest girl at the party
She cried the whole movie and got kicked out for saying "[Santa's beard] looks so soft I wanna stick my dick in it." We're going again next week. Drunk animation majors are the best
In other news, I'm pretty sure my mom was encouraging me to have a threesome yesterday... I don't even want to start digging in that garden of horror and trauma.
my talents include tricking people into giving me money and free drugs
You have not lived until you and a ginger miget chick are jumping and waving your arms in a pitch black bathroom to turn on the motion lights. Yes, today I have officially lived.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Randomize
