As heartfelt as your proposal was- I will NOT marry for money- especially to someone who still owes me $700. You r officially pathetic!!
im going to live freely with my legs opened and my heart closed
Just remembered i had an ordained minister bless my booze last night.
At one point in time, he cried and said I didn't appreciate him.
He gave me a trycicle he stole from a kid as an "offering" to have sex. I couldnt say no when he went through all that.
there is a dorito bag in my car full of my mouth blood
Excellent idea. Nothing says "congrats for resurrecting yourself, Jesus" like Greygoose at noon!
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
Well she got high, deleted the essay she was working on, and then ordered dominos. We all manage stress in different ways.
I may be going to Mexico. I just met a drug dealer at a strip club. Seems legit.
Brought some lesbians back to the light side of the force
I'm gonna watch porn and nap. I think I really have this Valentine's Day thing down
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
I climbed to the top of a stripper pole and touched the ceiling. Accomplishment?
Randomize
